Something's fishy

Maybe it's because I don't follow cricket, but I was confused by the email sent by The Fish Society on 24th August. For starters, why is the headline "Fish for Victors"? I get that England won the Ashes, but what if we'd lost? Would the headline have been "Fish for Losers"? Or do losers, instead of sinking their teeth into smoked salmon or lobster, have to make do with gruel?

Then there's the offer of "14% off everything". What's the significance of 14? Surely I'm not the only fish fancier who is perplexed.

Even more perplexing are the competing offers. At the top of the email, in lovely large type, a headline declares "Save up to 30%". A photo of "freshly cookeed [sic] lobster" has slapped on it a dot whack declaring "20%". Not 20% off, mind you--just 20%. Likewise the photos of salmon are accompanied by "30%", and a circle in the lower left corner of a photo of potted shrimp says "10%".

So assuming that the "30%" and "20%" refer to the discount on those items, do I get an additional 14 percent off if I type in the pertinent code? Perhaps I'm supposed to be intrigued enough by the offer that I'll want to click through to find out.

As it is, I'm so frustrated from trying to make sense of it all that I click another button instead: the delete button.--SC